WeaponFoodResourceSkillingActivate
Reveals future market trends and causes minor existential dread.
StackableConsumableEquipped
Bonuses
- Foresight
- Yes
- Profit Boost
- 7%
- Dread Aura
- Yes
Tier V · Legendary
Pocket Prophet of ProfitWeapon
A palm-sized idol carved from black-market bullion and whatever material was binding the vault walls in the subprime years. It is warmer than it should be, and the eye sockets track the nearest screen whenever a number turns red.
WeaponTypeAlso food, resource, skilling · Activate action
LegendaryRarityTier V
9,999 $KHashValue
0.3 kgCarry1×1 — 1 cell · does not stack
9Level req.666s cooldown
Entry
Item
The Pocket Prophet of Profit is a tarnished golden idol small enough to fit in your hand, though doing so comes with whispers of premonitions and market anomalies. Legends claim it was smuggled out during the final minutes of an infamous financial collapse, clutching secrets that could predict futures… or end them. Rumor has it that it was once owned by a Darth Dick, vice president from an imperial empire located in a far far far away galaxy.
- Grants 7% profit boost during active trades
- May induce ambient existential dread
- Cooldown: 666 seconds
Acquisition
Section titled “Acquisition”This item cannot be bought. It finds you, usually after strange dreams involving quarterly reports and a subway station with no exits.
“I asked it what to invest in. It laughed. Three weeks later, my hedge fund turned into a literal hedge.”
Credit
Section titled “Credit”
Off-Market Acquisition
An elevator opens below sea level. No buttons.
DevLog
Section titled “DevLog”- 05/27/2025 – Deployed initial version of the Pocket Prophet of Profit
Chronicle
Lore
Reputedly forged under Wall Street in the fourth quarter of 2007, during the long weekend when the lights never came back up. The original custodian was a CFO who signed two resignation letters before his own, neither of them his, and he has not aged since. Holding the idol long enough grants clear forecasts of near-future markets; letting go becomes measurably harder each time.
Originally forged beneath Wall Street in 2007 Q4 by The Black Vault Syndicate. Allegedly blessed by a former CFO turned lich. Art by KBVE Pixel Workshop.